Chapter 5

I said, “It's a friend of mine. She lost her passport and asked me how to get a replacement.” Emmanuel hurried over and hugged me. “You scared me to death. I thought you were going abroad without me.” I turned my head and vomited again. He had a strong, sweet, fishy smell. It was mixed with the scent of women's perfume. Emmanuel gently patted my back: “What did they feed you? I clearly told them earlier that you need to take care of your stomach these days... Wait here, I'll go fire them all!” This time, I pushed him away with all my strength. “Fire whoever you want, but stop using me as an excuse!” Emmanuel was taken aback by my sudden outburst: “Erin, are you angry with me? Because I was busy with work all day and didn't spend time with you?” He said, “Then this is what we'll do: tomorrow I'll cancel all my work and spend the whole day with you, okay?” I laughed in frustration. “Just spend time with me?” “Yes, just spend time with you.” I took a deep breath and slowly exhaled: “I hope you mean it.” That night, for some reason, it suddenly started pouring rain. From the moment I got home, I kept vomiting. Emmanuel tried to get closer to me, but I firmly refused him: “Don’t come near me. The smell on your body makes me vomit even more.” Emmanuel sniffed his sleeve and said, “Maybe you don’t like the scent of my cologne. I’ll switch to a different one next time.” “Emmanuel, you should know it’s not about the cologne!” “Alright, don’t get angry. I won’t wear any perfume from now on. Is that okay?” I splashed cold water on my face, looked up, and stared at myself in the mirror. Outside the bathroom, Emmanuel was holding a basin of hot water, waiting anxiously. I just don’t understand why, even now, with his body still reeking of the sweet, musky scent of intimacy and Janet’s perfume, he can still act so seriously about loving me? I don’t get it. Why does Emmanuel seem to care about me, yet still betray our marriage so brazenly? Does this really prove the executive’s words: ‘Men can fool around with women outside the home, as long as they keep it hidden from their wives’? He misjudged me; I’m not that naive or easily deceived. I also haven’t abandoned my principles. Since it’s no longer wholehearted love, I don’t want any of it. The next morning, Emmanuel took me to the hospital. After a series of tests, the doctor concluded, “It’s probably emotional gastritis.” Emmanuel asked, “What is emotional gastroenteritis?” “It means the patient has recently experienced significant emotional stress, which has had a profound impact on them, leading to abnormal gastrointestinal function and resulting in vomiting.” Emmanuel asked me, “Erin, have you encountered anything upsetting recently? Tell me, maybe I can help you resolve it.” I turned away, avoiding his closeness: “You can’t resolve it.” “Just tell me about it. There are few things in this world I can't solve.” Yes, this matter is indeed something only he can resolve. For a moment, I considered asking him, if both Janet and I were drowning, who would he save first? But then I thought— One should not entrust their fate to another person; If you want something done right, do it yourself. I can swim; I can save myself. I no longer need Emmanuel. In Norway, I applied to an art school under Harriet's name. Back then, I gave up my dream of continuing to paint to marry Emmanuel, but from now on, I will live for myself. “Erin, shall I accompany you to the movies this afternoon? There's a comedy out recently that will make you happy.” “This afternoon? Don't you have to work?” “We agreed that I’d be with you all day today. I keep my word; I never go back on my promises.” The next moment, his phone rang. He was about to ignore it, but after staring at the caller ID for a second, he hesitated. I watched his expression change from initial irritation to obvious discomfort. I smiled: “Answer it. Work comes first.” Emmanuel said, “I’ll be quick. Just give me five minutes.” “Alright.” Emmanuel was about to leave with his phone, but I called out to him, “Just take it here. I don’t understand company matters anyway, so don’t worry about me spilling the beans.” Emmanuel paused awkwardly. After hesitating for two seconds, he answered the call, his brows furrowed with anger: “Didn’t I tell you not to call me today? What’s going on?” I couldn't hear what was said on the other end. But I faintly heard the sound of a woman crying. Emmanuel spoke cautiously in front of me: “Alright, I understand. Wait a moment.” After hanging up, Emmanuel apologetically said to me, “Erin, there's an important document from the company that needs my signature. The manager has already brought it to the hospital. It's downstairs. I'll be back after signing it. It'll take no more than half an hour.” I nodded. Emmanuel practically ran out of the examination room. The doctor smiled and said, “Ms. Roberts, Mr. Roberts really loves you. He even abandoned his work for you.” “Is that so?” I forced a smile. “Excuse me, doctor, I need to use the restroom.” “Alright.” As I stepped out of the examination room, I saw Emmanuel rushing down the stairs instead of waiting for the elevator. He had indeed gone downstairs. But the floor below— was the obstetrics and gynecology department. Buzz— My phone vibrated. [Janet: Erin, I'm so sorry, but he might not be able to accompany you today~ Just one call from me, and he'll rush to my side.]