Chapter 97 62: Soul Forgiveness

She knew they would be shocked, but she had never imagined this will be the expression on their faces when they saw her coming back home with Alhaji, as he firmly held her shoulders to support her from falling down. They watched, with terror in their eyes as Alhaji guided her to a sofa and she leaned in silently, painfully. She wanted to go and sleep, just sleep even though she knew being at rest will be the last thing her heart will do. But she wanted the numbness of sleep, the forgetfulness and everything. "Kamila!" He called out, ignoring the two women that were staring at them, unable to hide their shock. Dahlia walked down the stairs with Nana following behind her and they all rushed to where Fareeda was. Fareeda broke into tears when she saw them and despite them hugging her excitedly, she cried painfully. At least she knew in her family, there were some that will cry as much as she did over the loss of her Muhaseen. "Muhaseen is dead, Nana...Dahlia. She has been buried in Cameroon." She managed to utter, and she could see in a swift as grief took over their faces and almost immediately tears began to pour down their cheeks as they asked if she was sure about what she was saying. "Good evening, Alhaji." Kamila said as she slightly bowed down to show her respect. "Get the other maids to have Fareeda's chamber cleaned and if she needs something else, get it for her or tell me so I can assign someone to do that, okay? Do that fast please, she needs to go and shower and also sleep." He said with care coalesced in his tone and he turned to how the three of them hugged themselves and made a mess of their cheeks. Alhaji went over to them and placed his hand on the girl's shoulders. "Come on, why don't you try to console her, umm Nana and Dahlia? You see, she has been through a lot, discovered a lot of painful things that she has to be distressed over it but all we can do to her as her family is show her that she can walk through this painful phase of her life, is for us to give her she strength, okay?" "But Abba, Muhaseen." They quivered at the same time and he bent over to their level and firmly hugged them. He knew how much they loved the baby, he was deeply hurt himself but to be the rigid shoulder Fareeda wanted him to be now, he had to hid his pain so she can pull herself through this. Nana had never felt something as deep as Muhaseen's death since her father died and she could say at that time, she was just a small girl that didn't fully understood what grief stood for, but for today, she knew how it felt. She had missed her baby, she wanted to hold her and have her smile at her even for once more. When she saw Fareeda, she thought she was together with Muhaseen because that was the first thing she was going to ask her had it been Fareeda wasn't so quick at telling them she was gone, forever not to be back. They only had her memories and pictures to hold onto, nothing else. "It's okay, I know it's so painful because it's hurting me deeply as well, but what can we do? We have to be strong for Fareeda, okay? And pray for our dear Muhaseen." He pulled them softly away from his body and smiled at them, "Now, you two should go and cook something for Fareeda, Nana you know all her favorites, try to make the one she can eat at least to regain back her strength." They all turned to Fareeda at the same time and asked in unison, "What will you like to eat, Ya Fareeda?" She had to smile despite the pain that was rustling through her and trying to prove her lungs wrong, she wasn't going to live through this, she clearly knew. "Anything, I miss the food here, your cooking, Nana. I've missed all of you, but this isn't the way I thought I'd be back, without Muhaseen..." The moment she started to cry again, Alhaji shoed them off because he knew they might end up making a deeper mess of their cheeks than this time. He sat down on the sofa and finally looked at Ummah and Asma'u that still had a dreadful look on their faces and they were still unable to utter a word from their lips. "You two can have a sit here, I thought I could wait until she's feeling better but I realize it will only be fair for her if she feels this pain for once and try to overcome it all at the same time." He flashed Fareeda a soft look, wondering how she must be feeling in her heart. How it would be to lose a child and that death happened to be caused by your own blood mother, how terrible must she have been feeling? That was why even when Mujaheed's father tried to ask her to stay, Alhaji calmly told him that she needed to come home and recharge her soul, because he knew leaving her there was the same as pushing her to death. He watched as they walked over and sat down, staring at them with shock, pain, anger, and distaste. "Fareeda..." He called her name softly and she wiped at her tears even though more gushed down on her cheeks before she turned to look at him. "This is my wife, Hadiza as you know, but I want to tell you something you've never thought I knew." He turned to Ummah that had a dreadful expression on her face and began. "I got married to her not so long after your mother's demise, at least that's what you knew. But the time you knew we got married wasn't the actual time I got married to her because at that time, she was pregnant and it wasn't permissible to get married to a pregnant woman in islam. I took her to China with me so I will disguise that for her and cover up for her, she gave birth to Asma'u there and we got married in Chine, stayed there for some time so that even if we came back, no one will realize the lapse in Asma'u birth..." He wasn't able to finish his sentence when Asma'u turned to look at Ummah with the most shocking expression on her face, she could hear the sound of her thumping heart. "Ummah, what is he trying to say?" He saw as the plea clouded her eyes as she held Ummah's hands firmly, silently begging for all this not to be true. "Yes, you're not my daughter, Asma'u. You're her ex-husband's daughter. I wouldn't have told you this secret I promised to keep with my life if you hadn't tried to kill the daughter I've loved with all my soul, twice. I know about everything, I've heard everything and amidst your plans, I have mine as well." He pulled his phone out of his pocket and called a number, "Come in please." He said with a trimmed voice and they watched him, not being able to comprehend what was trying to happen to them. Fareeda was stupefied, please, the only thing left for her was someone to tell her that she wasn't living, she as a ghost. Because she doubted if there would be a day that will be as shocking as today was to her life. How could she discover all these things in just less than 24 hours? They fixed their eyes on the door and their Lawyer walked in with a professional look on his face. He shook hands with Alhaji before he found a space on the sofa and sat down, not glancing them a look. "I know you're terrified to see him, right? He's my lawyer and I deliberately sent him your ways because I want to know your plans. Hadiza," his bloodshot eyes turned to Ummah that was sweating and her whole body was shaking, "The first time I started becoming suspicious of you, even though I've always knew you hated Fareeda and the reason why I treated her the way I did most of the times was because I was afraid to show her some love and you'd hurt her like everyone hurt her to get to me. I knew something was wrong the day you vanished at night, and that same day turned out to be the day Fareeda nearly died. I've never mentioned anything but I saw you coming from the security door at the back of this mansion, both you and Asma'u that late at night and when I checked my keys for that door, they were momentarily missing before you brought them back after the usage. "I deliberately took us to that Umrah and London because I want Fareeda to have a full rest, I don't trust her around the two of you because I know whatever happened to her that day, was because of you even though I wasn't certain at the time, but I became certain when I overhead the two of you conversing in London about how your murder wasn't successful and now you have to find a way to get rid of her for good. I wanted to show the two of you that I know what's happening but something in me told me not to. "Knowingly, I asked the Jordan embassy to revoke Asma'u's visa so that she had to stay there for a long time because I know if she's here, the love she has for Mujaheed will always push her to do horrible things to Fareeda and I'm glad I did that because Fareeda had a peaceful time taking care of her pregnancy and successfully giving birth to her baby, may Allah bless her soul and fill her gabr with nothing but his Noor and Rahma. "You see, Hadiza, what you don't know is, I've had Faksa under her name even before I met you. It has always been Fareeda's and will forever be hers, I'm just there as her guardian but that empire belongs to my daughter, because she's my motivation, she was given to me by Allah when I needed her and that was my gift to her. I deliberately brought out the paper to get your attention and it did. I saw you taking the document, I was aware that you sent them to Asma'u and you two began to look for a solution because you believe I hate her and she doesn't deserve to have that asset from her father while you so well know that the daughter you're trying to have this transferred to, isn't really mine. "I was the one that asked Barr Fahad to suggest those two ways for you because I want to be sure if you still have the intentions of killing my baby, and as it turns out, you did. You asked those in Cameroon to kill my baby and her daughter, and as it is, Fareeda has more time to live on this earth, it was only Muhaseen that was harmed by your dreadful deeds. Those papers you had me signed were fake, and do you know what? They're papers that confirmed Asma'u isn't my daughter, he gave it to you to sign and you did, so unless I want any of my money in Asma'u's name before I die, she wouldn't have even a single dime to her name." He turned his attention to Asma'u that was crying so terribly as though the one that was being slaughtered alive. He was aware she was in so much pain, she wanted to regret and would like it was even too late to regret. "Asma'u, I didn't do that because I don't love you, no, as I promised to your mother to take care of you as my daughter, that's what I'll do for the rest of my life. Imagine what this would make Fareeda feel, you got all the love she should have gotten from her father, you got all the attention, all the praises, all the good words, all the pampering while all she got was the cold treatment, the insults, the hatred, the beatings and whatever it was meant to hurt her feelings. To her, you were the loveliest daughter of mine while she was the most hated. Asma'u, if you could be true to yourself, do amongst you should have this unshaken hatred for the other and wish to have the other vanished from the earth?" From the way she was crying, he knew she couldn't answer him but he had to continue, ""I believe she should, but she has a good heart that she isn't that bad. No matter how much I bad mouth her, I think I know her soul. She's a good person, she has a very kind and big heart. Fareeda is lovely and so innocent that if I do something bad to her, I'd have to lock myself in my room and cry my eyes out, because deep down, I know she doesn't deserve that treatment. But I have to do that to keep her safe from your mother. "You're still my daughter, I'll still take care of you and you'll continue to live with me until you find a husband and get married and forever, I'll regard to you as my daughter. But I have to do this now, I'm done hating Fareeda and pushing her away from me just because I am afraid she will be hurt, because if I do that, I might not have the time to amend my mistakes when I want to. So, you'll have to be taken to the police station as well, for revealing her past to those that contacted you in Cameroon, for hiring those men to kill her in this house, for forging a fake DNA result and letter, for sending those pictures to Mujaheed numerously, for asking those people in Cameroon to kill my daughter and her daughter ended up being wrapped in this mess. "Both you and your mother will face the law. Even though I know your mother is behind some of these things, she pushed you to do them, you're also a part of it. I'll get you back to school when you're done serving your verdict, you'll be done with school and come back home to us. But justice has to be served, and the innocents shall get it the way they deserve it." He blocked Asma'u cries from his ears because if he let them get to his heart, he might not be able to do all he wanted now. He turned his eyes to Ummah that was rooted to her spot, "I won't disown your daughter because so far she has been a good one, and I love Asma'u fisabillah. But for you, I have no other choice but to divorce you, Hadiza, you're a bad omen to my family. Therefore, you're divorced with two thalaqs, I won't fill the other because Allah hates it when we divorce with three thalaq's at the same time. When you're done serving your verdict of attempted murder on my daughter and murdering her child, I'll buy a house for you in your state and area of choice, give you some money to start up a business to take care of yourself. I'm not this kind because of you, I'm doing this because of Dahlia, I don't want her to have a bad impression on me. At least we have a daughter together, so it wouldn't be fair for her if her mother goes around without a place to settle down." He turned to Barr Fahad, "Please call the police to have the two of them arrested." Fareeda immediately shook her head, "Baba, can we please not get them arrested?" She spoke weakly, feeling as though a rock was placed in her chest. "Why?" Both him and Barr Fahad asked and she cleared her tears before she spoke again. "I've forgiven them." She said with so much weight being taken off her shoulders. She had never thought she could forgive something so huge, and that sin shouldn't be coming from Ummah and Asma'u but one thing she realized was, sometimes the forgiveness was better than the revenge. Because she knew if she let them get arrested and taken to court, they will be in her mind for a moment, she'd wonder how they were doing and all. But knowing they were somewhere living their lives, she wouldn't have to bother herself about them. Moreover, she wasn't going to forgive them because they deserved it, she was forgiving them because her soul deserved the peace that came with forgiveness. "Not have them arrested please, I have forgiven him. But I need them away from me, because for a mean time seeing them will be like seeing the murderer's of Muhaseen, and it wouldn't be good to my heart. Asma'u should go back to school, and Ummah should be away from us since she's not your wife anymore. Buy her the house, give her the money and have her out of our lives. I didn't speak there because it's a royal house and their rules couldn't be changed. But I know I can say something here, I can change something here. I've forgiven them, but I don't want to have anything that will remind me of this painful phase of my life, at least for some time." Alhaji smiled brightly at her before he turned to the two women that were bitterly crying, "You see? I've told you she's the kindest soul alive. May Allah bless you, Fareeda. May he ease your pain and heal your wounded heart." Silently, she answered with Ameen and stood up to her room without flashing any of them a look. She went directly to her bathroom, took her shower and as she scrubbed off her body, she cried terribly. Today had been a rollercoaster of emotions and all this while she thought her heart wasn't strong enough, only for her to realize that she was stronger that she had ever imagined. She slumped on her bed and her eyes caught Muhaseen's diaper from her slightly ajar closet, she broke into tears, feeling as the new waves of pain engulfed her heart and she knew for a fact that she would have to live with this pain for the rest of her life.