Chapter 69 43: Unhealed Trauma

She felt the therapeutic air of Membila and eased herself despite how she wanted to do nothing but keep on frowning herself. But she had something for nature that no matter how much she tried, she couldn t help but relax and close her eyes. She turned to the man lifting down their luggages and briskly stared at the house they were going to stay for a few days and after that, it will be Taraba, if they go back to Sardauna for a few days and get their things packed. If anything, Nana had to go back to school next week. She heard that they had resumed, there was a day when she heard Nenne having a call with Alhaji as she told him he didn't have to come, she was living okay without him. Someone s hand on her shoulder brought her out of her reverie as she turned to see who it was. "Take your hand off me unless you want to loose it forever, Mujaheed." She threatened through gritted teeth and forcefully shrugged his hand off her. Mujaheed stared at her with a lingering smile. He didn't know what she meant anymore, one minute she was the soft Fareeda he knew, loving and smiling and the next, she had turned into one fiery woman he always had difficulties to decipher her thoughts and actions. "I'm sorry, Fareeda. I don t even know what I've done to you anymore but I just know that it s among my daily routine to apologize to you every blessed day. Is that what you want?" She rolled off her eyes, clearly exasperated with having him around her just when Kawu Shehu walked out of the house with an appreciative smile on his face. "Kawu Shehu," she drawled excitedly and walked to where he was, completely ignoring Mujaheed s existence. He only folded his hands over his chest and stared at how she was smiling at Kawu Shehu as they exchanged pleasantries and she condoled him over his great loss. He walked over to where they all stood and immediately, Nenne introduced him as Fareeda s husband, and they shook hands and exchanged pleasantries before Kawu Shehu ushered them in. Mujaheed was aware of how she had relaxed around her uncle, which was the first time he had seen her truly relaxed and happy whenever she was around her father s siblings or even relatives at large. It was as if the prominent hatred she had for him had been passed onto his siblings and whole relatives. Well, with the exception of Nana, Nenne and now Kawu Shehu. He thought she would request a different room, but to his surprise, she didn t even argue with Nenne pointed at a room and told them it was theirs, it was as if she had been waiting for it to happen. They walked together and saw their luggage already brought in and Fareeda slumped on the bed, taking off her glass as she placed it on the bedside drawer. "I'll take a nap, please wake me in an hour or two. No, or just leave me until I wake up myself, I've never been this sleepy my whole life." He didn t say anything to her, just watching the way she took off her jewelries without any difficulties even though she didn t have her glass on. There were certain things that if she did them without her glass, he felt proud of her. Because it looked as if she knew how to do those things with just her heart, and it was truly amazing, Mujaheed mused to himself. She fell asleep maybe the next minute she had the duvet wrapped around her with an eased smile on her lips and like she said, he didn t wake her until she did that by herself. Nearly an hour after they had already prayed their Zuhr Salah and when Fareeda couldn t see her luggage, she knew Mujaheed had already arranged everything for them into the wardrobe, and that made her smile. Because there were times when she knew having Mujaheed was a blessing to her, because she knew not all men were the same. No one could ever be like Mujaheed. He came into the room and found her thinking with a hint of smile on her lips. He placed the tray he had brought her food with and smiled before he sat on the bed, staring at how fully relaxed she looked even though she had her hair roughly dishellved into every direction. "Thinking about me?" He asked and she immediately turned to look at him. She pulled her feet down on the cool marbled floor and wondered why it was so hard to take him off her mind. And what worsen it for her was he was always there whenever she needed him, well expect the day she nearly died. "I need to take my bathe, what time is it? Did Nenne ask for me?" She asked at a go and Mujaheed shook his head. "No, I told her you fell asleep and everyone excused a pregnant woman, Fareeda. It s just a few minutes left until 4 in the evening. You should hurry up and take your bathe so you can pray, here s your lunch, made with love by the amazing cook of this house. But Nenne requested something different for you." She eyed the tray then back at him. Who did he think he was bringing food for to bed? Even though this wasn t the first time she woke up with him bringing food for her, she was still annoyed at him to even appreciate the effort. "You don t have to tell me what I need to do, I know exactly what I should do." She furiously stood up and he smiled, still staring at her while her nose flared up in anger. "You don t have to be furious just yet, I assure you there s something more bigger than this to be angry of." She didn't even waste her time to have and give him a befitting answer, instead, she walked into the bathroom thinking of how beautifully Kawu Shehu had renovated his home. There were times when she wished he would go back to Taraba and stay there so she might have an escape route whenever it was all fire in their house, but the man had an immense love for Membila to even relocate to Sardauna. She ate her food after she had prayed both lost salahs and she sat down to eat, thinking of how it would be exciting to see the sunrise tomorrow morning in nothing but the greenery of this land. She would love to be surrounded by the well trimmed green and have a therapeutic conversation with her soul. She was halfway into the food when Nana knocked before she walked into the room after Fareeda asked her to come in. She sat on the bed above Fareeda that was still seated on the praying mat and smiled, "Didn t you miss Membila, Ya Fareeda?" She asked, and no matter how Fareeda wanted to argue with that, she knew her face will have to give her off and that was why she smiled instead. "I do, and it feels so good to be back here. What are you doing here?" "Nenne wants to see you in the living room, but I'll go and tell her that you re eating, you ll be out when you re done." She immediately rose to her feet, because she knew better than anyone that the moment Fareeda began to ask you what you were doing in her presence, it would be safe if you leave already. "Do I have to go and see her? What is it about, because for Nenne, it can be as unreasonable as seeing the new tv Kawu Shehu have in his living room or something along the line." She asked with a sigh that depicted her tiredness and Nana chuckled before she shook her head. "No, that s not it. Just come out when you re done." And that was what Fareeda did when she was done. She wrapped her veil around her head and went out, slightly humming to herself. In the living room, she could see two men from where she stood and if she wasn t married yet, her heart would ve stopped beating because she would really think that they were about to get her married already. But now, she knew it might be one of Kawu Shehu s friends that might want to see her and she undid her veil and wrapped it from her face down to her shoulders. She went to the living room and sat on the sofa with a respectful smile, "Nenne, you called me." She said and looked toward the direction of those two men to great them but the moment her eyes fell on Alhaji, she didn't know when she hissed loudly and stood up, "If this was why you summoned me here, Nenne, I'm afraid but I have something important to do." Nenne gasped as if she was just knowing about Fareeda s hatred for her dear father. "Who are you talking to that way?" Kawu Shehu asked and she immediately shook her head as she turned to look at him. "Don t get yourself involved in this, Kawu Shehu." She turned to Nenne that was looking at her with an expression that was so hard for them to decipher. You wouldn t know whose back she had by staring at her face. "I'm sorry, Nenne, but I think I'll have to take my leave now." She was about to walk away from from the living room when she heard Alhaji s commanding voice. "Who are you acting this way to, Fareeda? Have you lost it?" She furiously turned, because she was waiting for him to start speaking to her so that whatever she said to him would be justifiable. "Completely! I've completely lost it and if anything, you don t have the right to ask me who I'm acting this way to, it s you, unfortunately you call yourself my father." Alhaji furiously huffed out some air and tried to calm himself and Fareeda took advantage of that. "You don t have to try to calm yourself down, you can kill me to get rid of the thorn that had been diving into your flesh for so long, Alhaji. As easy as that will be. Because I clearly know that you wished I didn't wake up the day I died because that way, you d have to leave for a vacation with your family without your mother rubbing it on your face about how a despicable father you are!" She didn't know how he made it to where she stood but the thing that brought her back to her senses or in the actual sense, made her anger flew to a whole different level was the loud and striking slap that was laid on her cheek. She placed her hand on her cheek, not taken aback or surprised because she knew this had always been the way they ended things. It had always been violence for him and when it came to her, her words always made sure they got to him right through his heart.