Chapter 854: Getting Drunk is Not Scary

Jared buried his face in his hands, unable to look directly at Tina. The problem? She was completely tone-deaf. Her singing wasn’t just bad—it was catastrophic. It sounded like some unholy cross between a wailing banshee and a malfunctioning car alarm. Who could have guessed that someone as brilliant as Tina could sing like she was summoning demons? The entire room had nearly ascended to the afterlife. And the dancing? Words failed him. Where on earth had she learned moves like that? “Heave-ho, heave-ho, pull the turnip! I’ll shoot your head off with one shot...” “I love taking baths, turtles falling down, oh-oh-oh...” Tina’s impromptu concert raged on until four in the morning. Thankfully, the Brookes family estate was isolated—no neighbors to call in noise complaints. Otherwise, the police would’ve shown up hours ago. Finally, Tina ended her “performance” with a dramatic, off-key rendition of “I’m a girl, a cute girl...” before collapsing face-first onto th